


Your Saliva is Tasty

by StarFeather



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Comedy, F/M, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:29:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25232413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarFeather/pseuds/StarFeather
Summary: Ron didn’t think cooking needed perfection, he just wanted an ordinary good meal when he was hungry. He didn’t like to be kept waiting for meal for long.
Relationships: Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Luna Lovegood/Rolf Scamander
Kudos: 4





	Your Saliva is Tasty

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for The Weasley Cooking Challenge hosted by Deeds.
> 
> -He was so jealous of his sister, Ginny. Harry Could Cook.

Ron was staring at Harry’s back in the kitchen. He was so jealous of his sister, Ginny. Harry Could Cook. And He Made a Delicious Meal in a Short Time.

Harry wiped his hands with a white linen cloth and set a plate of salad and a bowl of mapo tofu in front of Ron. “Voila! Now eat them!”

Ginny smiled at her husband fondly and passed a spoon and a chopstick to Ron. Her belly swelled up and she looked extremely happy. She asked,

“How’s Hermione? Is she fine? I’m afraid she’s been working so hard at the Ministry.”

“Yeah, that’s a problem. She hardly cook these days.” Ron sighed.

“Oh, I’ve thought her cooking skills reached to a higher level, I mean using her wand when she cooks.” Ginny served mapo tofu into his plate and handed it to him.

“Thanks,” he filled his mouth with tofu. The sauce was superb, the oyster and red pepper had him groan with satisfaction. “It’s very good, Harry. How did you learn cooking?”

Harry grinned wide and urged him to eat rice with mapo tofu. “When we visited East Asia, the camp site owner told me some Chinese dishes, don’t you remember?”

Ron frowned for a moment, and answered, “Wait, was that the time when we chased the culprit who tried to run away from our investigation?”

“Yep.” Harry scooped the mapo tofu with a spoon and ate. “Hmm, I should’ve put oyster sauce more, but not bad.”

“How could you find time to learn cooking?”

Ginny chimed in, “While you were making a big snoring noise, brother. Harry, can I have another bowl of rice? This mapo tofu is so good!”

Ron shook his head seeing his sister’s appetite. “What would mum say if she knew you let Harry cook?”

“You don’t have to worry. She knew. She was delighted when he made pasta for her when she stopped by. She thinks I’ll cook again after a delivery.” She had already finished up her plate.

“Do you eat desert?” Harry asked her.

Ginny gasped in pleasure, “Of course! What did you prepare today?”

“Almond jelly.” Harry grinned before standing up and walked to the fridge.

Ron sighed again. He was looking back his own married life with Hermione. After he retired from Auror’s job to help George’s joke shop, Hermione got busier at the Ministry. Before that, she used to cook for him, consulting a magical cooking book. Though cooking and flying were her weaknesses, she made an effort to prepare better meals for him. Her cooking skill became better, but she needed amount of time to finish, sometimes, unable to stand by, he helped her out. She tended to seek perfection for cooking like she did in her study at Hogwarts. Ron didn’t think cooking needed perfection, he just wanted an ordinary good meal when he was hungry. He didn’t like to be kept waiting for meal for long. But now, those were the good old days. At least, she tried to make an effort for him at that time.

“How’s Hermione? Last week, I saw her quarrel with her boss in the corridor.” Harry sat down the opposite of Ron. He began serving almond jelly to each bowl.

“Law revision thing for house-elves. She comes home late every day. Thanks,” he took his bowl from Harry.

“Who cooks, then?” Ginny asked.

“We order delivery from ‘Working Bee’s Diner’.”

“I’ve never heard of it. Is it Italian?” Ginny scooped the almond jelly into her mouth, “Hmm…yummy.”

“Chinese. It’s not so bad.” Ron ate it, too. The taste of jelly was the most delicious one he had ever had. “It’s good. Harry, did the guy at the camp site tell the recipe, too?”

Harry stopped eating and hesitated for a moment. Ron didn’t miss the sign. Ginny kept eating it without noticing it at all. Harry said carefully,

“I’ll tell you how to get the recipe.”

* * *

The piece of parchment Harry gave Ron was in his pocket of the jacket. Harry didn’t reveal who the mysterious cook was before Ron left for Ireland. There was an address of the flat instead of the recipe on it. The flat was located near the Muggle pub in Dublin. Suppressing the urge to jump in to have a full Irish breakfast at the pub, he stood in front of the tiny building painted indigo blue. When he was perplexed where the entrance, the woman’s voice was heard from above.

“Ron, enter from the red door.” It was Cho Chang. She was waving to him from the window.

“Huh!” Ron convinced that Harry avoided to mention her name in front of Ginny. He believed his best mate, Harry just wanted his wife to be calm before delivery. The matter around Cho got on her nerves. Ginny got still sensitive around the old relationship between her husband and Cho.

When he reached to the top of the stairs, Cho was smiling, let the entrance door open.

“Welcome to my apartment. My husband has just gone to his office. Come in.” She greeted him cheerfully. She looked extremely happy with her new life with a Muggle guy.

“Well, I’ve heard the rumor you got married to a Muggle. I’m very happy for you, Cho.” Ron said the congratulatory words awkwardly and looked around the living room. The wall of the room was painted warm bright yellow and wild flowers were arranged on the kitchen table.

“Oh, thank you! We should’ve invited old Hogwarts friends to the wedding, but I thought it might be better with Muggle relatives and my parents.” Cho showed her apologetic look.

Then he heard a dreaming voice from behind. “Hi, Ron. You look the same.” It was Luna Lovegood.

“Luna?” Taken by surprise, Ron stared at her. She looked more beautiful than his memory of her with a lion hat in the Quidditch pitch. Her blonde hair was braided and swirled to make a flower on the top. “You look stunning!”

“Thank you, Ron. You look handsome, too.”

“I called her. She’s exploring old Celtic heritages with Rolf Scamander. Where is your fiance?” Cho asked Luna.

“He engages in talking with the lad he met on our way here. Never mind. He must have found a new discovery.” She smiled and sat down on a chair in the kitchen. “Will you cook?” She noticed the kitchen tools on the table.

“Yes. Ron came here to learn how to make the almond jelly and the mapo tofu.” She put on the military navy apron and handed Ron the same one.

Perplexed, he stood there. He had never wore the Muggle work cloths. He was at a loss.

Cho giggled and said, “Wear the loop over your head.”

“Okay.” He took it gingerly and put it over his head. “And?”

“Take the strings and pull them to the back.”

He did as she said and asked, “And?”

“Put one string over the other, and…”

“Wait, how? I don’t guess how to …”

“Oh, Ron, look.” Cho turned around and showed how to put and pull the strings on the back and knot the tie in front.

“Okay, I’ll try.” He tried doing the same as her, but it wasn’t easy to tie them beautifully as Cho did. He redid it but failed. His strings looked untidy compared with her appearance. “Could you tell me the spell to tie the strings? It’s easier doing magic.”

“No. Cooking is putting your affection as a seasoning. If you do magic, it’s not a homemade dish at all.” Cho said with a serious look.

He was going to say his mother had cooked using magic, but he swallowed his words. If he had retorted against Cho, she might have told him to go to the Burrow. Before visiting Cho, Harry suggested him to ask Molly to help him. But he dismissed the idea for he was afraid that his mother would take Hermione to task for always coming home late and have no time to cook lately.

.

Ron shrugged and asked her, “Okay. I understood. Well, from where do we begin?”

Then Luna opened her mouth. “Ron, you look annoyed by something. Just relax. Where has your wit gone?”

“Thank you, Luna. I’m okay. I’m just a bit nervous. Cooking is not my strongest.”

“Rolf will tell you a funny place later.” Luna said and sat down to read her father’s ‘Quibbler’.

“Okay, wash agar and fill the bowl with water to soak it,” Cho said and turned around to take a pack of soy milk from the fridge in the kitchen.

Ron was puzzled over looking at a bowl of white powder and a rectangle solid not knowing which was ‘agar’. Then he picked the bowl and pulled a lever of the tap and poured water into it. Then Cho cried,

“No, Ron! What are you doing? Stop it.”

He stopped and said, “I was washing it. You said that.”

Cho heaved a big sigh, “It’s not agar. It’s almond powder. Ron, there’s no difference between cooking and brewing potions.”

“Well, for your information, I was horrible at Potions.”

Cho rolled her eyes and said, “Then ask me before doing it. I could tell you that.”

“I’ll do. I’m sorry. We cannot use this anymore, can we?”

“No. It was the last. We need to go shopping to the small Muggle Chinese town to buy it.” Cho looked calm but Ron was sure she was completely flabbergasted at his thoughtless behavior.

Luna put down the Quibbler and said, “It sounds fun. I’ll go with you.”

On the way to the Chinese town which was located in Parnell Street, Luna noticed her husband coming to them. She ran up to him. Rolf Scamander had the same height as Harry and his hair was sandy blond. His skin was dark-complexioned. She talked with him for a while and walked arm in arm with him to Ron and Cho.

Luna said, “Rolf will guide you. He knows a fantastic Chinese restaurant. Let’s eat brunch and get almond powder.”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Weasley. It’s my great pleasure to see one of my heroes who saved the Wizarding World.” Rolf held out his sunburned hand.

Handshaking, Ron felt awkward. Every time he was praised by someone for his cooperation with Harry, he felt a bit embarrassed. At first, he was easily pleased, but after a few years, he understood to be respected by people meant he should behave like that, which made him feel uncomfortable.

Luna had been observing Ron and said in her dreamy look, “You don’t need to be nervous when you are with Rolf. He is very friendly and loves to make people laugh. You’ll see that soon.”

Cho agreed with her. “She’s right. My husband couldn’t stop laughing at dinner yesterday.”

Ron looked back his life with Hermione. When did they laugh out loud since Hermione was promoted in the Ministry? He remembered Harry’s words that he spotted her quarrel with her boss in the corridor.

When they sat at the red round table in the Chinese restaurant, Rolf and Cho competed ordering dishes and Muggle waiter and waitress got busy with serving them. The most highlighted thing on that day was not what Ron learned from Cho but what Rolf told him about the names of the dishes. He laughed very hard after Rolf’s explanations. After brunch, he asked Cho to tell him how to cook three kinds of Chinese dishes they ate at the restaurant adding to making almond jelly. When they came back to Cho’s flat, Ron concentrated his attention on learning cooking Chinese dishes and making almond jelly like the time when he played Wizard Chess.

* * *

When Hermione stepped out from the hearth in the living room, she thanked her old friends. Without Luna and Rolf’s support, she couldn’t have hold on to pass the Act for house-elves. Then the smell of the roasted meat made her hungry. She remembered she had only snacks and a glass of water for lunch that day. She expected that Ron had warmed a delivered dinner box from‘Working Bee’s Diner’ in the oven. She had a slight of guilty feeling that she hadn’t cooked for Ron for weeks remembering Molly. Then Ron came skipping from the kitchen to her. He sang a Muggle TV quiz program’s theme song loudly and said,

“When you give me a correct answer to my question, you can eat.”

“Oh, Ron, please! I’m so hungry. I have no energy to answer to your quiz!” She begged her husband.

“Nope. You need to answer to my question first, then you can eat. Sit here.” He beckoned her to sit down cheerfully.

Though she was exhausted, she couldn’t suppress her smile at his grin. Then she heard a familiar voice from behind. She saw George Weasley emerge from the kitchen, but she was dumbfounded by his head. An unroasted whole duck covered his face to the neck. George’s muffled voice was heard from inside of it,

“Please answer only yes to my questions.”

“Only yes? Can’t I say no?” Hermione hardly stifled her giggle.

“Question number 1. You have ever thought of your boss a**e”, “pee”, “hole.”

Hermione answered ‘yes’ laughing hard.

Unroasted duck George shouted, “Correct!” then his duck head was launched from the top of his head and landed on the plate in the center of the table. Then he pulled his wand and swished it. The unroasted duck vanished and a mouth-watering Peking duck appeared instead. Ron began slicing off a piece of meat and served with cucumber sticks and pancakes for her. And he told her how to eat.

“Spread sauce over the pancake and put the cucumber sticks and the meat. Roll them and eat.” He passed the spoon to her.

She took it, did as he said and ate the rolled Peking duck voraciously. The crispy meat and the crunchy cucumber with sweet bean sauce brought her into the heaven. After eating five rolls, George said,

“We are very happy to see you eat like a Pixie, my lady. The duck will say thank you.” George bowed politely. “Now, question number 2. Are you ready?”

Hermione licked her fingers on which sweet bean sauce left after eating slices of a Peking duck. She wiped her mouth with a table napkin Ron handed and said, “Yes, I’m ready.”

“Question number 2. You check if your face is perfect for the Daily Prophet’s interview anytime (George mumbled, ‘especially by Rita Skeeter) and never failed in casting glamourous charm on your teeth.”

Hermione tried hard not to say ‘no’ and finally said, “Yes.”

George shouted, “Correct!” At the same time Hermione shouted, “Ron! Did you tell what I do every morning to your brother?” while George was laughing so hard. Ron put the second dish on the table and ran away to the kitchen. Hermione read the attached card on which the name of the dish was written, ‘油爆河蝦’, and she noticed the translation into English, it was read ‘The oil explodes against the river shrimp”. She started laughing and said, “Ron, your translation is wrong. Those kanjis just mean ‘Fried river shrimp’.” And she laughed hard again.

Ron showed his face again from the kitchen and said, “Rolf told me the funny translation by a Muggle. It’s so funny. Long time since you laughed so hard last time.” Ron looked very satisfied.

“Yes, I think so.” Hermione smiled and began eating the fried river shrimps. “Merlin’s beard. It’s delicious.”

“You’d better say shrimp’s beard. Actually, they are feelers. I’m afraid Ron forgot cutting the feelers of shrimps. Question number 3.” George continued, “You have drunk secretly after Ron fell asleep because you couldn’t bear his snoring.”

“What? I’ve never heard that you would prepare the question.” Ron questioned George. Embarrassed, he looked at his wife. “My snore woke you up?”

“Well, to tell the truth, yes, sometimes, but…”

George chimed in, “Correct!” and he ordered his brother, “Go and get the next dish, idiot.”

Ron retreated to the kitchen and came back in haste bringing the last plate and put it down in front of Hermione. She read the card attached to it and began laughing hard again,

“Merlin’s pants! It says, '口水雞' means your saliva is tasty in chicken. Is that Muggle translation again?”

Ron answered happily, “Well, I guess Muggle computer translation. It’s really funny, isn’t it, love?” And he went back to the kitchen and carried a bowl of desert. “Voila!” He put it down on the table.

Hermione scooped almond jelly into it and kept eating with a rapt smile. When she finished, she said to her husband, “Ron, it’s the best almond jelly I’ve ever eaten before. Did you cook all?”

“Yes, I did. You look full and happy very much.” And he kissed her.

After kissing, she answered, “Yes, I am, really am.” And she kissed him.

Kissing, he groaned, “Hmm, your saliva is tasty.”

George winked at them.

**The End**


End file.
